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Self-esteem is how we think about ourselves.
When we have good self-esteem, we feel positive about ourselves and our lives.
- We look after ourselves and ask others for help when we need it.
- We feel ready and empowered to take on new challenges and try new things.
When we have low self-esteem, we are very critical about ourselves and our lives. We also feel less able to face the challenges that life throws at us.
With low self-esteem, you may:
- Dislike yourself
- Worry that no one likes you
- Feel self-conscious or low in confidence
- Feel worthless or not good enough
- Feel like you don’t deserve to be happy
- Find it hard to make decisions or to tell others what you think or feel
- Be unable to see your strengths and achievements
We all experience ups and downs, and it is normal to have times where you feel less confident in yourself.
When low self-esteem affects you for a long time, it can start to negatively affect your emotional wellbeing.
What causes low self-esteem?
Your self-esteem can be affected by many things, including:
- Your beliefs about the type of person you are, what you can do, your strengths / weaknesses and your expectations of your future.
- Your personality – some people are more prone to negative thinking, and others may set themselves very high standards and then feel bad if they cannot meet them
- Difficult or stressful things happening in your life, like the death of a loved one.
- How you think you are compared to others – social media, TV, magazines and even pressure from our friends and family can make us want to look or act a certain way
How does low self-esteem affect us?
If you have low self-esteem, you may avoid things you find challenging, stop trying new things or hide from situations that make you feel scared.
While this might make you feel safe in the short term, it teaches you that avoiding things is the only way to cope.
This might mean you miss out on exciting opportunities as you move through life, such as going to college or university, travelling to a new place or developing a new skill.
Living with low self-esteem can also harm your mental health and lead to problems such as depression and anxiety.
How to have healthy self-esteem
There are lots of things that you can do to look after yourself and help you feel more confident:
Helpful resources
Resources to help you and others who may be struggling with self-image.
Related pages
You may also find these pages helpful if you have any worries about self-image.