We all feel angry sometimes, and often for good reasons!

But anger can start to be a problem.

Sometimes we express anger through harmful behaviour, either towards yourself or others.

Feeling angry can be scary and difficult to put into words.

It can happen because you’re scared or stressed. It can also happen because things are not happening like you thought they were going to. You may even feel angry and not know why.

How does anger make you feel?

Anger can make it hard to think properly.

If you are angry a lot of the time, it can be hard to look at what is making you feel angry and talk about it with others.

Anger can make:

  •  You tense up and clench your teeth
  •  Your heart pump faster
  •  Your stomach churn
  •  You clench your fists

After getting angry you might feel guilty about it. This can make you feel worse.

Some things we do when we’re angry are hurtful to other people and ourselves. If you notice you do these sorts of things often, it may be a sign that you need some support:

  •  Kicking, hitting and hurting other people
  •  Shouting at people
  •  Breaking things
  •  Losing control
  •  Spending time with people that get you into trouble
  •  Getting into trouble at school

How can I manage my anger?

It’s ok to take some time to think about what is making you angry.

You might find it helpful to keep a diary of what’s made you angry and how you stopped feeling this way.

It would also be useful to talk to someone you trust, like your parents/carer, about how you are feeling and how it is affecting your life.

Here are some tips for managing anger:

Give yourself time to think before reacting. Try taking some deep breaths or counting to 10.

Walking away gives you a chance to take some time out and stop things from getting worse

What happened? How did you respond? How did you feel after? Is there anything that is upsetting you? You may find it handy to write these thoughts down, record someone, or tell someone else.

Talk about how you are feeling with someone you trust, like your parent/carer. It can help lift the weight off your shoulders.

Do something that makes you feel different to angry – you could go for a walk, read a book or listen to some music.

If someone or something is making you angry, try just walking away – it can distract you and stop the situation from getting any worse.

Activities such as walking and swimming can help you to relax. Try to do something you enjoy!

It may sound simple, but try your best to sit back and relax!

How can I get help?

If you still are not able to manage your anger, you may want to speak to a professional about your feelings and your behaviour.

Find out more about how to access our Emotional Wellbeing & Mental Health services.